Today We Celebrate... ME!

This morning my darling children showered me with several mother's day gifts. They included:

1. A mystery plant (this thing BETTER not turn into a vegetable)
2. Two paper flowers with chenille stems shoved into a hunk of clay (might make a good paper weight)
3. A giant mug inscribed in sharpie with "worlds best mom" and their names. (I actually give G credit for  this.. it's pretty much payback for the one I got him last year, and an homage to the late great Michael Scott. He did pick a large mug, and I have an affinity for office supplies, so it'll make a great pen holder)
4. A card from the boys that says "if you were a rock star...." (Thanks for crushing the delusion that I actually was a rockstar)
5. A card from G that implies I steal the covers (nothing but lies...)
 
 I guess what's really important is what the gifts really say. Here's what I imagine my children would really be telling me if they could.

1. Thanks for making idle threats and letting us get away with things. Truth is, we'd probably do it anyway; your weak consequences are so worth it.
2. Thanks for teaching me not to play with my penis in public. Although this makes no sense to me now, I will be grateful to evade arrest in the future.
3. Thank you for giving up after the third time I've woken up and letting me sleep with you at 3:30 AM.
4. Thanks for not kicking me out of your bed when I elbow you in the face at 3:45.
5. and finally, Thank you for reminding me we are late in the morning. I would never know we were behind schedule if you didn't tell me I had 2 minutes to finish my breakfast 5 different times.

Yeah, my kids are pretty lucky they got me! Hope all of you had as great a Mother's Day as I did!!